The five craziest moments from Mariah’s reality show trailer

And what a trailer it is. In just 75 seconds, Mariah Carey fans have a whole lot to digest:

1. Her pieces to camera

The to-camera interview is a universal trope of the reality TV genre — at various points in any show, a Kardashian or a Real Housewife will appear on screen, speaking directly to the viewer to reflect on what’s just happened or teasing what’s coming up.

Here’s how Mariah appears for her to-camera interviews:

Take note, other reality stars. This is how you give an interview. HORIZONTAL and CORSETED.

2. The weird gauzey Photoshop camera filter that only affects Mariah

At several points during the trailer, Mariah appears to have been filmed through a sheer curtain smeared with vaseline. This is no surprise — after 25 years in the biz, girl knows what lighting works for her — but you can’t help but notice other people in the same shot look far more, well, human:

3. Her wedding to J-Pack already looks ridic

We see Mariah on the phone to a wedding planner demanding “white tigers, albino elephants ...” for her union to Australian billionaire James Packer.

“We’re gonna get Noah’s ark at your wedding, I promise,” he tells her.

After the phone call, she’s concerned. “If that guy doesn’t know that I was joking ...”

Were you joking though, Mariah? Were you really?

4. Her deep, spiritual need for puppies

It’s late at night and a tired and emotional Mariah appears at the door of her hotel room, clad in her casual go-to-bed jewels.

“You know how they always make up stories, saying that I want puppies and things delivered?” she asks the viewer, referencing the tabloid tables of her legendary diva demands.

“It WOULD be so cute to have puppies here. Come on, wouldn’t that be cuuuuuuute?”

BRING MARIAH CAREY THE PUPPIES.

5. This incredible blink-and-you’ll-miss-it shot

Bathe in this spectacular image: Mariah Carey in a rhinestone-studded ball gown, wearing sunglasses at night, exiting a private jet, suited security guard in one hand and what appears to be a large glass of red wine in the other.

For this shot alone, please give Mariah’s World all the Emmys in 2017.

Mariah’s World debuts on December 4 on E!